It is no secret that Facebook is an excellent online tool to keep you connected with your friends, from the ones you see on a regular basis to those you have not seen since you graduated high school. However, the social networking behemoth is also the source of the latest hot button topic in the ongoing debate to define the parameters of work/life balance. Namely, should you be Facebook buddies with a co-worker?
Recently, I have read a lot of articles and blog postings that encourage such online befriending, stating that a bond in the Facebook world would serve to further fortify the camaraderie between people in the workforce that already consider themselves friends. Moreover, some of these articles encourage supervisors to use their Facebook page as a means to further reach out to their employees. The rationale behind this particular mindset is that it would allow supervisors an easy way to show a more personable, “human” side toward the people that they manage, which in turn would allow them to appear more approachable in the workplace.
Frankly, it surprised me to see how much support this approach to Facebook has because it is ultimately a rather unwise idea, because it not only uniquely disrupts work/life balance, it is also a partial intrusion of a worker’s privacy. If you start befriending co-workers or the people that you supervise, Facebook instantly morphs into a place where the standards and decorum of the workplace unwittingly invade your personal space. Even if you modify your Facebook behavior to meet these standards, it does not mean that your old high school chum will automatically follow the same rules when he tags you in a photo of that shows you doing something while filled with the bloat of youthful stupidity from a bygone era. Moreover, befriending co-workers on Facebook will make them privy to information about your private life that you may not feel comfortable conveying to them in a real world setting – information that may ultimately cause an air of awkwardness or embarrassment in a workplace setting.
If anything, not seeking to be Facebook friends with fellow workforce members, either those above, below, or equal to you, actually comes across as a form of respect. By declining to be online pals, you are actually honoring the employee’s right to seek a type of disconnection between public and private that runs even deeper than the one that can get occasionally disturbed by a cell phone call or a Blackberry text. It makes me wonder if the proponents of interoffice Facebook connections equate the website with the quasi-shackles of hand-held technologies; if they do, they really should cease immediately, because such comparisons are fundamentally flawed. Yes, a call or a text will disrupt your life outside of work, but it does not intrude upon the private matters of your life like a Facebook bond would.
In the end, the cons of creating a Facebook bond with a co-worker far outweigh the pros. Granted, it might be fun to receive updates on your boss’s dog or view photos of your cubicle neighbor’s vacation. However, it is much more liberating to be able to enjoy Facebook without forcing it to succumb to the type of workplace impositions that may be best suited for an office break room.
#1 by Cliff on July 10th, 2009
Hello Richard! While I do agree that certain Facebook relationships may be considered inappropriate for the workplace environment, I don’t necessarily agree that the cons outweigh the pros. In my opinion it all comes down to “thinking before doing.” Of course, Facebook has a lot of potential for being misused, and often times our “strange” personal lives can alter another’s perception of ourselves. However, if we carefully develop our pages we can actually foster and strengthen relationships that may not have occurred otherwise.
Yes, it was textbook management/leadership to discourage relationships between the hierarchies. So I can understand your concerns there. After all, there are laws that are based on perception alone; therefore it may not be appropriate for some to be on Facebook. Nevertheless with new concepts such as “emotional intelligence,” which encourages new ways of leading/managing, there are benefits to using services such as Facebook, Linked-in, etc. to improve relationships and networks.
While we can’t control what “friends” do on our Facebook pages, we can control the content we choose to reflect who we are and the way we behave in public. Generally, if these basic rules are followed all should be well: 1) When using any service such as Facebook, don’t include information you wouldn’t want made public. 2) When friends and/or relatives take pictures of you, make sure you’re not drunk or doing anything too silly. 3) If at all worried about other peoples’ perception of you, then it would probably be best to forgo the idea of using Facebook.
#2 by Richard Manning on July 10th, 2009
Hi Cliff. Thanks for your response!
The last paragraph in your argument contains the very conundrum as to why being connected with co-workers on Facebook is not a good idea. At its optimum, Facebook is a tool to provide information about your life wtih family and friends in a uniquely informal way, to the point that it’s practically replaced e-mail as the main way to communicate information electroncially in some circles. As such, we feel comfortable communicating with them in the types of informal, colloquial ways that we would if we were hanging out in their living room. Bringing in any type of work element to it severly damages this purpose and spirit of the site, and we are left with an outlet where we have to carry the same kinds of facades that we must hold at work.
Also, regarding the Facebook rules, there are ways to prevent one’s page from being open to anyone except the people that a person befriends, essentially keeping the public out. That way, one doesn’t have to restrict the information that is posted for fear of the public eye (or people from the workforce). After all, everyone of us have things going on in our lives that we share with our friends and family that we would not think of sharing in work. Why take away a forum to do just that? Additionally, while I’m not advocating public drunkeness or any other kind of debauchery, it seems the rules state that if one has a Facebook account, he or she should essentially live his or her private life as an extention of a company’s employee handbook. To me, that sets a dangerous precedent.
There are other sites where an online connection between co-workers makes much more sense than Facebook. LinkedIn is the one that immediately comes to mind. However, Facebook’s original intention was to be a site for friends and family to have fun, be social, and escape from the pressures of day to day life, including work. What is wrong with keeping it in line with those original intentions?
#3 by Stan on July 16th, 2009
If one feels strongly about connecting with their colleagues both past and present – then another social network may work much better than Facebook – I personally use http://www.linkedin.com. It is geared much more towards professional networking.
#4 by Travis Kiger on July 16th, 2009
I agree, Stan. LinkedIn is a much better tool for professionals.
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